Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
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Totally just locked myself outside of my house, in my robe, with the fedex man and a box of sex toys. Not my week.
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
the chips you spilled whiskey on is not the same thing as Irish breakfast potatoes
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
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Okay so I'm high eating chili cheese fries bra-less watching Mulan, could I be doing any better at life right now?
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
I rewarded myself with Taco Bell tonight for going a full week without punching my roommates in the face or wishing bodily harm on them.
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
I'm going to come in the middle of the night and attack you with spoons
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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