if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
Woke up in her bed this morning with a half used condom stuck to the side of my face
How can a condom be "half used"?
Who am I sleeping next to in your bed? Where are you? Also when are you coming home... I need coffee.
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
He's like a unicorn and I just wanna domesticate him
I'm planning our wedding on the computer and our threesome on my phone. At the same time.
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
Randomize
