Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?
You took a bar mat shot.
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
Another day, another engagement, another cat
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He used the ring emoji and we've gone out four times. What is my life.
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
We're in an alley with a psychic wizard, shes reading our palms
Randomize