what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
didn't know how to tell his mom I was confused about how long we'd been together because we banged for a full year before making it official
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
i caught myself talking to a pigeon about my yeast infection.
What do I wear to meet his family/put his dog to sleep? Is there even an appropriate outfit for this occasion?
He just asked me if I wanted a ride on the "bologna pony." I never wanna have sex again...
I need to stop drinking and eating and start working out. I look like the lovechild of John Goodman and Jabba the Hutt.
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
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