Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
you went around the entire night in your french maid costume dusting off the "cob webs" on everyone's crotch saying "you havent gotten any action in a while"
I was wondering why i got so many friend requests the next day...
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
My boss asked me what was wrong today and I really wanted to tell her I woke up too late to smoke a bowl before coming in
Let me guess you did your hair instead? Has anyone told you about priorities?
By the time I realized I was watching a Danish porno with muppets it was already too late
Randomize
