someone get that fucking seahorse.
My mom is giving me a "don't tape yourself during sex" talk. It's going to be a long car ride.
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
All I want in life is to get high, take a shower, and him to go down on me. Simultaneously. That's legit my idea of heaven.
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
SpongeBob is life. I once broke up with a guy bc he said SpongeBob was stupid.
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
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