it was like eating out sand paper
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
he was so drunk I had to hold him up and he started crying when he heard an ambulance siren and said "is that for me?"
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
That's how pantless uber rides happen
I don't think we should let her have pot anymore. She ate an entire package of bacon half-cooked and screamed that it was al-dente.
Randomize
