your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
the women in the ladies room did not appreciate my innovation of turning a sink into a urinal
I'm drinking a margarita out of my 'best bj' trophy and it tastes like victory.
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
Just thought you should know that we coat checked our fairy wings last night. Getting belly up to the bar was way more important that wearing our costumes.
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
Oh, fuck yeah. I swear I came with every bite. Not even joking. Messiest meal ever.
Wow, thanks for ruining pizza for me. I didn't think it was possible.
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
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