Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(805): View more from California

Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!

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(805): Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter! http://tfl.nu/vj10

Replies (9) Good night (2621) Bad night (884)
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(631): View more from New York

dude, i woke up naked in her front yard...apparently i tried to leave in the middle of the night, forgot my clothes and decided,"oh heres a nice patch of grass to sleep on" I think god is up there laughing at me.

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(631): dude, i woke up naked in her front yard...apparently i tried to leave in the middle of the night, forgot my clothes and decided,"oh heres a nice patch of grass to sleep on" I think god is up there laughing at me. http://tfl.nu/uux2

Replies (8) Good night (3261) Bad night (767)
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(651): View more from Minnesota

she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.

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(651): she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks. http://tfl.nu/ad27

Replies (16) Good night (4362) Bad night (780)
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(913): View more from Kansas

Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.

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(913): Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in. http://tfl.nu/xn3x

Replies (16) Good night (886) Bad night (3244)
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(850): View more from Florida

I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity

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(850): I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity http://tfl.nu/pmac

Replies (6) Good night (3138) Bad night (1113)
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(512): View more from Texas

He talks to me in this sweet I know you might be pregnant voice.

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(512): He talks to me in this sweet I know you might be pregnant voice. http://tfl.nu/cehn

Replies (7) Good night (911) Bad night (3153)
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(780): View more from Alberta, CA

The key to alley sex is drunkeness.

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(780): The key to alley sex is drunkeness. http://tfl.nu/zhh3

Replies (7) Good night (2209) Bad night (790)
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(941): View more from Florida

Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.

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(941): Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything. http://tfl.nu/u3ar

Replies (9) Good night (3985) Bad night (696)
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(479): View more from Arkansas

I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.

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(479): I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him. http://tfl.nu/81m9

Replies (9) Good night (1527) Bad night (543)
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(614): View more from Ohio

I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun

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(614): I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun http://tfl.nu/01eg

Replies (14) Good night (1342) Bad night (995)
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(803): View more from South Carolina

I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.

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(803): I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT. http://tfl.nu/pk4z

Replies (4) Good night (1435) Bad night (505)
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(715): View more from Wisconsin

I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.

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(715): I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night. http://tfl.nu/5yhi

Replies (6) Good night (547) Bad night (1354)
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(919): View more from North Carolina

We need to step up our tailgating...they're here drinking out of a prosthetic leg

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(919): We need to step up our tailgating...they're here drinking out of a prosthetic leg http://tfl.nu/wnu9

Replies (6) Good night (981) Bad night (452)
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(302): View more from Delaware

OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...

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(302): OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but... http://tfl.nu/stjw

Replies (6) Good night (823) Bad night (357)
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(218): View more from Minnesota

His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.

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(218): His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me. http://tfl.nu/111u

Replies (0) Good night (518) Bad night (246)

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