Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
Dude you have to stop using "I eat good pussy" as a pick up line
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
On your way out, lock the front door. And by lock the front door, I mean find the door handle, reattach it, and then lock it.
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
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