Texts From Last Night

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  (216): View more from Ohio

  If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.

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  (216): If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer<div>(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.</div> http://tfl.nu/erbk
  Replies (4) Good night (975) Bad night (1538)
• Favorite

  (408): View more from California

  hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner

  (1-408): View more from California

  if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends

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  (408): hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner (1-408): if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends http://tfl.nu/qgda
  Replies (29) Good night (4571) Bad night (919)
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  (901): View more from Tennessee

  I really wish I could go back in time to change the course of events that led to me sitting on the internet at 3 Googling 'Traumatic masturbation' while talking to you about failed dates, and running a virtual restaurant in a video game.

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  (901): I really wish I could go back in time to change the course of events that led to me sitting on the internet at 3 Googling 'Traumatic masturbation' while talking to you about failed dates, and running a virtual restaurant in a video game. http://tfl.nu/7tak
  Replies (15) Good night (544) Bad night (2328)
• Favorite

  (858): View more from California

  So my Christmas cards this year will be my mug shot with my kids face photo shopped next to me....too ghetto?

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  (858): So my Christmas cards this year will be my mug shot with my kids face photo shopped next to me....too ghetto? http://tfl.nu/poyg
  Replies (18) Good night (1411) Bad night (3428)
• Favorite

  (785): View more from Kansas

  Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.

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  (785): Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here. http://tfl.nu/9zh4
  Replies (26) Good night (3614) Bad night (695)
• Favorite

  (802): View more from Vermont

  you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.

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  (802): you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv. http://tfl.nu/a1rt
  Replies (15) Good night (5556) Bad night (844)
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  (903): View more from Texas

  she went home with me because she said i reminded her of paul rudd. remind me to thank him for his awkwardness

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  (903): she went home with me because she said i reminded her of paul rudd. remind me to thank him for his awkwardness http://tfl.nu/pvnd
  Replies (13) Good night (3632) Bad night (756)
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  (425): View more from Washington

  This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son

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  (425): This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son http://tfl.nu/qxal
  Replies (7) Good night (928) Bad night (2769)
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  (360): View more from Washington

  I'm reciting my presentation (beer in hand) on the porch to a snowmen audience.

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  (360): I'm reciting my presentation (beer in hand) on the porch to a snowmen audience. http://tfl.nu/k7n6
  Replies (12) Good night (4456) Bad night (829)
• Favorite

  (314): View more from Missouri

  you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"

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  (314): you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole" http://tfl.nu/qzvn
  Replies (11) Good night (1952) Bad night (861)
• Favorite

  (518): View more from New York

  Welcome to texting with Mike. You're now leaving the sober section and headed to our insanely high bad decision making portion of mike. Enjoy the trip.

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  (518): Welcome to texting with Mike. You're now leaving the sober section and headed to our insanely high bad decision making portion of mike. Enjoy the trip. http://tfl.nu/y6yl
  Replies (9) Good night (3214) Bad night (984)
• Favorite

  (334): View more from Alabama

  Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.

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  (334): Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions. http://tfl.nu/wk8c
  Replies (1) Good night (1242) Bad night (617)
• Favorite

  (207): View more from Maine

  So after tonight I now have 6 Harry Potter movies left to get laid to. Before tonight it was 8. Fucking right

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  (207): So after tonight I now have 6 Harry Potter movies left to get laid to. Before tonight it was 8. Fucking right http://tfl.nu/bi9y
  Replies (7) Good night (1318) Bad night (357)
• Favorite

  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  he cancelled our romantic dinner reservations so we could stay home and watch a Rocky movie marathon and order pizza. i know i should be upset but i think i'm kinda in love.

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  (412): he cancelled our romantic dinner reservations so we could stay home and watch a Rocky movie marathon and order pizza. i know i should be upset but i think i'm kinda in love. http://tfl.nu/yxe9
  Replies (2) Good night (655) Bad night (202)
• Favorite

  (609): View more from New Jersey

  You know you're hung over when the glare from the cream cheese on your bagel is just too bright...

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  (609): You know you're hung over when the glare from the cream cheese on your bagel is just too bright... http://tfl.nu/5odl
  Replies (0) Good night (485) Bad night (351)

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