East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
Do you think I threw out my left shoulder during the keg stand or the stripper pole? It's medically relevant my chiropractor wants to know.
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
OH MY GOD IT'S LIKE SHOOTING FISH IN A BARREL, EXCEPT INSTEAD OF FISH THEY ARE FIGHTER PILOTS
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
Hi,\n\nYou left your underwear in my Uber. Thanks and bye.
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
There's even glitter on my cock...
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