But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
Apparently, my drunken 3AM idea of safety is to send a GPS map of my location to someone 700 miles away. Seriously considering death as a viable alternative to this hangover. Death or Yuengling.
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
I'm not going to be your wingman while you are in the hospital.
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
Randomize
