Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
On my way to the DMV to get arrested
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
Just had hot animal sex with the guy who had been sending me 10 second selfie snapchats for the past month
I have drunkenly angered a family of raccoons. Please send help immediately.
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
If we hadn't just agreed to no commitment, i'd totally propose right now. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
I just found a condom in my jolly ranchers bag. This is a good omen.
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
I made the antidote to the nasty cognac. I AM THE GOD OF MIXED DRINKS.
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