i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
i knew it was time to leave when he woke me up only wearing pooh bear oven mitts and holding a plate of thank you pancakes
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
He texted me for a bootycall at 2:00am so I rolled outta bed and shaved my legs but then he decided he wasn't coming over...he lost his bootycall privileges
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
My entire news feed is ice bucket challenges. I wish there was a hide from feed button like FarmVille
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
Btw, remind me to tell you about how I had to cancel my crazy wild sex plans with Will b/c my roommate came back from his trip after a day b/c Canada wouldn't let him in. Fucking cockblock.
Actually that's the whole story. You don't have to remind me.
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
I'm sitting here drinking whisky and listening to The Wiggles, I don't need a social life
I'm at this party and a blind kid just walked in and asked "where is the fucking pong table"
Its pretty bad when you can tell twins apart by the size of their penises...
Randomize
