Remind me to tell you about the dream where im a fighting a super hero whose only weakness is sunkist.
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
And the best part is I don't remember putting the condom in my pocket! Angels officially exist
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
There should be a company that sends nadgrams. They're like candy grams except the recipient gets kicked in the balls.
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
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