if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
I mistook a propane tank for a keg.
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
I think that's the first time i've seen 'you look like an ugly version of my ex' work as a pickup line
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
My goal is to have my roommate find me sprawled out in the middle of my floor naked and passed out. Maybe with some Alfredo chicken hanging out of my mouth. I don't know, we'll see where this goes.
Just bought plan b at 8am. Then the cashier asked if I wanted to donate to the children's miracle network. Fml
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
Randomize
