I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
New low: falling asleep with my face in the toilet only to be awoken when my hand slid down and touched the water. It's moments like these I wish I could forget.
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
I'm getting drunk by myself again. But I'm not shotgunning any of them. That's self-restraint, right?
Her roommate was talking on her cell when I came out of the bedroom and I definitely heard her describe how shitty and terrified I looked. Awesome.
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
you were huddled over the toilet, throwing up, and every few seconds you'd look up and say "this is such a waste of vodka" then put your head back down and start puking again
Randomize
