So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
if you find a joe biden blowup doll in the attic, I call dibs
are you so shy because you have an std?
i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
jacking off on stolen wireless... gotta enjoy the small things in life
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
I have a kicked-out-of-multiple-bars level hangover today
We found you facedown on his couch in a pile of cheerios, with only one shoe on. Dude you said you were staying in last night.
Because I'm currently dying, lacking waffles, and vaguely convinced I'm an eagle
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
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