I'm eating my dinosaur chicken nuggets in the order they would die in the food chain.
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
The saltiness of my tears mix perfectly with the tequila.
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
Moral of the story: don't have drunken shower sex with the lights off...or you WILL break your foot. And the shower knobs.
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice.
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
Nobody cheats on THIS.
Randomize
