You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
Welp...herpes.
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
Was expecting a sext from Kristi and then my mom randomly sent me a pic of her ugly Xmas sweater. Worst. Buzzkill. Ever.
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
Just got an email from match.com trying to match me with My ex..I nearly pissed myself laughing
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