turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
Its 6am and I'm sitting on the couch watching Clifford. Crying into my risotto because emily elizabeth helped the girl in the wheelchair get over her stagefright so she can win a trophy. Never drinking alone again.
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
The front desk girl just had that condescending welcome-home-from-your-walk-of-shame face on
It was probably because you set your bra on the couter while you found your ID...
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
Randomize
