maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
if women knew the size of my dick, theyd be much more receptive to my sloppy drunken advances
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
My plan to hit on all your friends went to shit after the 3rd dirty martini.
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
Randomize