We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
he stole me 6 pairs of frilly undies and proclaimed "your ass looks like a 5 in those. it'll be a 10 in these bad boys". every girl needs a gay bff.
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
Yeah to go race car driving with a 54 yr old gastroenterologist. I really wish you'd come to have that drink with me Wednesday
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
Visiting my great uncle went well. The highlight of the evening was when he said, "Oh my god. I'm 79 and I'm teaching 18 year old kids how to roll a joint."
Randomize
