apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
I woke up with a bloody knee, 6 burn marks on my thigh and glitter nails If anyone asks I'm going to say You came into town
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
So it turns out "let's pretend to be gay so guys will stop hitting on us" was step one in her plan to get me into bed...
Is it weird that I have your number saved in my phone as baby Jesus?
The guy like flippppped out and made me pay $15 for a car wash. I thought I was being extremely courteous by making sure to puke outside the window
There’s a stripper dressed like a slutty pilgrim. Is that a thing?
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