Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
I feel like every car around me knows I'm driving in my snuggie
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
He started using my brother's rc helicopter as a beer delivery device. He's a drunk McGyver.
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
While I appreciate the pity sex (seriously, THANK YOU) we should not do it 3feet away from my ex when he's passed out next time. Awkward.
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
Randomize