You know whats sad? As I walk past the campus daycare i cant help think, look at those drunk mistakes
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
Was I asleep on the ride home?
Yea, then when I tried to hold your head up on a turn, you round house punched me in the face.
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
I drank a girls breast milk at this wedding. Shit was next level
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
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