All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
I tried to get you a girl. They want us to cook breakfast though
Lolll I'll be sleeping
I'm practically buying you a 1 way ticket to pound town.
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
No clue what you did last night, sorry. You did hand me a pizza and a mason jar with $1200 in small bills in it when I let you in though.
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
Randomize
