Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
then you asked me to turn your jeans into "jorts" just long enough to cover your ballsack
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
I just found a thank you note I apparently wrote to my bed last night for letting me borrow the comforter.
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
you did a full monologue with your sober self last night. different voices and everything.
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
I just walked in on Joel doing a buck naked tripod headstand in front of the mirror so he could see the bug bite on his balls
Randomize
