In the future we'll all be gay
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
You pole danced in your parka.
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
I'm so hungover that I just wrote up my will because I'm afraid I'm gonna die. I'm leaving you my bong.
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
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