I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
so, I mean this in the straightest way possible, but don't you ever just feel like you owe Jon Stewart a blowjob...
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
I feel like strippers are like dogs, the more you show you're terrified the faster they come at you.
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
Karaoke machines out. We're taking turns farting into the microphone. Shits going south fast. Definitely be awake when you get home.
I told people at my moms bar that all I needed to sober up was to get my asshole licked, and I blame you 110%.
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
Randomize
