i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
you started crying because you didn't get to wear your rainboots this week so i turned on the shower and let you jump around in it
youre the best friend ever
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
she kept asking for a lobster dinner while she was crying. it was actually the most reasonable drunk chick request i've ever heard.
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
I am alternating between eating dry cheerios and mint chocolate chip ice cream with a fork. Please love me because no one else will
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
My New Years resolution is to not hook up with random guys.
Mine is to not hook up with anyone who has a kid.
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
Randomize
