she always made me post sex PB&Js it was like fucking a trashier Martha Stewart
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
I just realized I'm trading you a pregnancy test for the morning after pill...
It's been a bad semester.
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
I think I'm leaving the streamers and balloons up from 4th of july till after he stops by. It'll be like the universe is celebrating his massive dick.
Hey can you send me a copy of my mugshot? I need it to prove a point
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
I am eating a king sized snickers in the strip club. Good morning.
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
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