we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
HER PREGGO ASS BROUGHT SPEGHETTI-O'S... IN HER PURSE.
sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
I think that's the first time I've heard someone say "this is the safest way of doing things" while holding half a gallon of jagermeister
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had a dream about a vibrator with 42 different settings. If that's not a good indication I need to get laid, I don't know what is
His ex-girlfriend just gave his current girlfriend the heimlach omg omg omg help this is so awkward
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
I'm sun burnt so instead of getting drunk and trying to sleep with you, how about we get naked and you scratch my body and rub lotion on me while I rub one out?
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
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