is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
Just ran into a client at a sex shop. The meeting tomorrow is going to be really awkward as we both try not to picture each other using vibrators or role play costumes.
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
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