So we've decided on 'hamburger' as your code for tonight. If you add ketchup or fries, we know the threat level has escalated.
Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
My present? It was a fake boarding pass he made in Photoshop. He litterally just gave me a one way ticket to Pound Town
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
I'm going to keep a tally of how many lives I ruin this summer. Starting today.
Already at 3 and it's not even noon.
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
I think pants incapable of making pants work
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
Randomize
