Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
I have the worst wedgie. Seriously. Its horible. And there are people everywhere around me.
Slide your hand down the back of your pants and shift to the side slowly
...are you coming on to me?
What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
You're about to makeout with my vagina, I don't think she cares that you haven't brushed your teeth. Just get over here!
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
Apparently this establishment won't let you rent a sailboat if you have been drinking rum all morning
Like, bro, how do you think I got the idea to go sailing
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
I thought he was hot. You know, in a “I’ve gone batshit insane and want blood for the blood god” sort of way.
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