We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
Shit is getting real. I just adjusted my search radius for my dating profile to ANY FUCKING WHERE
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
Randomize
