i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
No idea. I woke up in the middle of the night to you drooling and gnawing on my arm. Then you rolled over, punched the air 4 times, then proceeded to talk about your hair in your sleep.
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
Randomize
