Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
im about as happy as oj after his trial
God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
I now have a bottom rung on my kissing scale. Like I can say "Well. On a scale of Matt to Braxton he was probably a Zach." It's the little things.
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
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