I puked a lego.
Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
I made her dinner: Beefaroni with grated parmesan cheese on top. Luckily she showed up drunk and gave me head, "For spending so much time preparing."
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
Randomize
