so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
I cut my penus on the lid.
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
You're not invited to the wedding. They don't want you starting a "who's fucked the bride the most" contest.
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
Should I tell them about my ticket for possession or about how I'm shitting blood? Which one will gain the most sympathy?
my brain is opting to stay half drunk rather than relearn how to think. the rest of me is in no position to argue.
We're not piercing ourselves today.
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
Apparently I was directing traffic outside of Keeneland. Apparently I'm not a police officer. Who knew....
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
Randomize
