Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
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