im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
Sat in the shower and reenacted the "Wiggle your big toe" scene from Kill Bill. THAT hungover.
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
You know you're a heffer when you discover chocolate frosting on your smoking apparatus
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
In case I die. I'm in ares truck with a bartender named Dave from chuys. JUST IN CASE. And let the people know my last words were suck my dick. My like literally.
Randomize
