Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
I forgot it was 4/20. that COMPLETELY explains the 7/11. i was like "that's a lot of white dudes... and they're really into snacking."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
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