the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
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