How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
So we were banging and she started puking all over my bed. I'm not sure what's worse, her puking, or that I felt the urge to start singing Flip-adelphia.
I was trying to be really smart and save 10 dollars for each cab there and back. ...so I ripped a $20 dollar bill in half.
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
Randomize
