I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
i just added a shot of fireball to my iced coffee. goodbye sobriety.
Like I owe him sex. Hell fucking no. I owe myself sex. With a celebrity. Or a clean pornstar. Who knows.
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
Randomize
