Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
I just want a pillowcase full of fast food so I can eat and sleep this hangover away
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
I will literally have glitter in my crotch for weeks.
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
Randomize
