I made out with a fat chick last night in a hot tub... btw I am breaking up with you
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
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