You just made me feel so damn special
idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
It was kind of weird
What did your mom walk in?
She flung her tampon across the room.
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
I'm drunk eating a quesadilla while this kid is tryina come over and I'm just like no. I want the quesadilla.
You ruined the universe
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
Randomize
