she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
I think the waitress doesn't beleive I have friends coming. I've had 4 drinks and a large salad just waiting for you guys.
Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
You know.... I ordered the nipple clamps when I was drunk. But on further consideration, THANKS DRUNK ME I LIKE WHATS HAPPENING
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
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