she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So i learned you can't hair-of-a-dog jaeger hangovers.
Then she yelled something like "YOU HAVE SO MANY FORKS!" before collapsing on the floor
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
That is true. Vodka is like a dog. Always loyal, warm, and there for you when you need it
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
This is exactly why you shouldn't bang your bartender. Although the awkward free shots are a plus.
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
Found like seven bruises in the shower. One was shaped like a hand. Best. Sex. Ever.
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
Randomize